Jaspers Memorial Heart

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This is the second night that I got Jasper. This was his first doggie bed. He must not have ever had his own bed since he was laying outside of the bed and not in it. 

On October 21st at 3;30 P.M. my jasper went over the Rainbow Bridge. (Click Here to Read about him before he went to the Rainbow Bridge) Jaspers Memorial Heart that has some of his ashes in it came back yesterday (December 1st). I received an email last Weds and they said that Jasper was coming home and it will arrive either Friday or Saturday and to expect him then. I know that it isn’t his physical self, but it is a part of him since his ashes were in the heart.

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I’ve been having such a hard time since Jasper died. He has had a special place in my heart since the moment I got him. Jasper chose me and has always been my dog. Jasper could say “My Momma” even though my husband would say he is just being vocal. He can say whatever he wants to say, I know he said “My Momma.” It was always when I was gone and just came into the house. he would chase our other dogs away and he wouldn’t let them come close to me. Jasper was pretty loud when he did this.

 

When Jaspers Memorial Heart arrived yesterday, my hands were shaking and I had to wait for a few minutes to wait to open it. I did stab my finger since I was in tears and shaking. Thankfully I didn’t hurt myself too bad.

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This is an image from Rainbow Bridges Website- If you’re lost a 4 legged family member, you should contact them so you have them create something special from his/her ashes.

Richard or Erin from Rainbow Bridge Hearts was awesome to work with. They replied really fast anytime I had a question or concern. My friend Eric Dodge went through Rainbow Bridge and I’m so happy that he shared the information. I would have scattered Jaspers ashes if he didn’t share the orb he got for his dog Anna and his cat Bart. They died a few weeks apart and Rainbow Bridge created a memorial orb for Eric. I never heard of anything like this being done out of ashes.

When I finally got past the shaky hands since I knew what was in the box, the tears started flowing. Rainbow Bridge did such a wonderful job on it. Jasper’s heart was beautiful and I loved it. I ended up getting the lighted stand and it was perfect. it’s hard to find the right words when it comes to describing how perfect Jaspers Memorial Heart was. I know I could never get him back since he has gone over the bridge, but I have a part of Jasper that I can hold in my hands.

Click on the images below so you can see the full-sized images. Thank you Rainbow Bridge and thank you to the person who gifted this to me. On the back of the heart, you will notice that I had them put “Momma’s Boy”.

There won’t be a time when I won’t miss him. When I’ve had other dogs who went over the Rainbow Bridge I always think of them. Our dogs are more than dogs, they are family. I’m so grateful and blessed to know that there is someone like Rich and Erin who owns Rainbow Bridge Ashes to Glass.

I’m beyond grateful to whoever gifted Jaspers Memorial Heart to me. Rainbow Bridge only told me that it was someone who read my blog.  If you are the one who gifted jasper’s heart, I want to thank you a thousand times over again.

if you’re looking for a way to create something special in memory of your four-legged family member, this may be a good option.

Rainbow Bridge Contact Information from their website:

“Together Forever” Your Pets Ashes Memorialized in Glass Art

Crossing the Rainbow Bridge has never been more Beautiful.

Rich & Erin

Rainbow Bridge Hearts

PO BOX 1408

Langley, WA  98260

  • On Facebook as Rainbow Bridge Hearts
  • On Twitter  @Therealrainbow6
  • On Instagram as Rainbow Bridge Hearts

 

Missing Jasper

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This is the bag that Dixie Vet put Jaspers ashes in. 

I was working on the powerpoint for my church and I took a break so I could check my voicemail. I realized I haven’t checked it for a couple of days. The first voice mail was from Dixie Veteranariums Pet Hospital. I just miss Jasper so much. I’ve been watching the videos I’ve loaded on yahoo and sadness takes over my feelings. This video is about 2 1/2 minutes. I’ve played it so many times. I think mainly as a way of me needing to justify sending him over the Rainbow Bridge.

I was listening to the message that one of the guys in the office left for me. He said that I could come and pick up Jasper. Instead of me picking up Jasper following him being sick, this time was different because I have to pick up Jaspers ashes. He went over the Rainbow Bridge last week and it’s been very difficult.I’ve been watching the videos I uploaded onto youtube and I cry. I do my best to watch his videos after Chuck goes to bed since I cry without notice.

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Jasper hanging out where I can love on him anytime he wants it. 

When I sit in our spare bedroom which has turned into my office, I can’t help but think about Jasper. Jaspers’s bed was right next to my desk. If I wanted to pet him, all I had to do is reach down and pet him. If he wanted extra lovings, he would move to where my hand is and he would nudge his head against my hand. I didn’t keep Jasper is one of our crates because he got to the point where he couldn’t even lift his hind legs the opening where the door is. The grates have a 1-inch step up and he couldn’t do it.

I got snappy with my other two dogs Henry and Parker. Henry went to lay on Jaspers’s old bed and I got upset because that was Jaspers’s bed and nobody else. I didn’t mean to get upset, but I did. I also love Henry and Parker. I felt bad that I got upset with them. I was organizing things and I put Jaspers’s bed and bowl down on the floor for a few minutes.

After I calmed down, I gave Parker and Henry some extra loving, cried and told them I was sorry I got upset. I know they are dogs and probably didn’t know what I was saying. But, I needed them to know that they are loved and it wasn’t right for me to get upset with them.

Thank You For Your Kindness and Generosity

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Everyone has been very kind. One person donated the funds for me to have a small number of his ashes made into a memorial glass heart. As I’m crying uncontrollably, I don’t know how I can ever repay their kindness and generosity.

Then a friend that I worked with is going to create something for the rest of Jaspers ashes. My heart is overwhelmed because of the love and generosity that everyone is showing me.

In closing, I just want to share that I know that Jasper’s soul isn’t in the body since our bodies are just a vessel for our souls and spirits. I know that he isn’t hurting any longer. I miss you Jasper and I know you are in a much better place.

Jasper RIP- You’re Free

I’ve been working on this blog post for over 8 hours and I just can’t get past the tears.

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Jasper came into my life in August 2010. Jasper is my pug who rescued me more than me rescuing him. Less than 12 hours ago (10/21/19) I had to do what was best for him and let him go over the Rainbow Bridge.

I knew this day was coming about six months ago. Every day I could see that he’s getting worse. When I noticed in April or May of 2019 that he was having paralysis in his hind legs, my heart sunk. I knew when I have seen this happening that his time was short. Which means that my time with him is short.  Video of his hind legs. 

There are some people who don’t understand that our 4 legged family members are part of the family. Today has been a bad day and I’ve been in tears off and on. Anytime I see a dog on TV or anything on the computer brings me back to the moment I had to decide what was best for Jasper. It wasn’t for me, but I couldn’t put my needs and wishes ahead of his comfort and quality of life.

When I walked into Dr. Brinkerhoffs office with Jasper in my arms, the tears started flowing and I couldn’t even tell the receptionist that I didn’t want to take his body home with me and that I needed him to be cremated so I could turn his ashes into something beautiful. I was crying and trying to find my voice. There were other people with their dogs in the waiting area and they were in tears I’m sure because I was in tears. I’m in tears now as I type this. For me, this post gives me a chance to tell Jasper how much I love him and there will never be another 4 legged family member like him.

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Jasper getting a treat- Oct 2011

Jasper was my shadow. Anywhere I went, he would be there. Everyone knew that Jasper chose me when I got him. I thought he would like Jessica more since she is the first person that loved him. When we picked him up it was Jessica who was holding him all the way home. As soon as we got into the house, Jasper immediately came to me. I think it was because I reminded him of someone who he loved before I got him.

As I was standing next to Jasper as they gave him a shot to make him fall asleep and 3 minutes later the vet came in and gave him an IV med to stop his heart just breaks my heart. I could see his breathing getting weaker and eventually his breathing stopped. The vet told me I could take my time with him since he was gone. I know this sounds crazy, but, I couldn’t stand there with him after he was gone considering 5 minutes before he was alive.

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Since Jasper couldn’t walk to go out to potty a dear friend gifted this wagon to Jasper. 
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If you look at his leg and how there aren’t any muscles to walk or anything.

I know I did what was best for him, but, it breaks my heart big time. One of the assistants in the office wrapped Jasper in a blanket. All I could think about is to keep him in the blanket so he will be warm. The logical part of my brain knows that once he died, his soul is no longer in the shell of his body that gave out on him. I believe that Jasper is now in a better place where he can see people or things. He can run and play since he hasn’t been able to since is hind legs became paralyzed and atrophy affected his muscles. He could hear some things and he would search for me since I’m guessing he could only see shadows and find me by hearing. He’s free of the things going on in his body.

As I walked out of the room where I last saw Jasper, some dear friends from church were outside the door. Rose and John Balderama was there since the vet needed to check out their dog. It was a huge blessing for me with them being there. I know they have lost their dog last year and went through the same thing. I was somewhat composed when I left the room until Rose gave me a hug and the tears started flowing again.

I can’t help but think that God put them there when I needed someone the most. My friend Jennifer Harris drove Jasper and me and she was in the room at the same time when Jasper went over the bridge. When I think that I have no more tears, then they come again.

Kindness and Compassion

bekindI’m working on a blog that will follow this one. I was going to just post the blog that will follow this first. But, while I was looking for Bible verses about kindness, I decided to do this one first. This post will be a three-part and then I will post the draft I have already done.

I’ve had a number of random thoughts on things recently. I was watching a service on ROKU. It’s from a church in Tucson, AZ.

You can be nice and not care. You can be nice to someone and still not like them. It happens all the time in this world. I had to look up information about

What the Bible says about kindness.?

  • True kindness is Spirit-produced –   But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, Galatians 5:22
  • Romans 2:4  Or do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience,  not knowing that God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?
  • But love your enemiesand do goodand lendexpecting nothing in returnand your reward will be greatand you will be sons of the Highestfor he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Luke 6:35
  • Our kindness reflects the heart of our Father. “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).

lovekindnessI was thinking about how some people are considered nice or polite. Being kind to others is, in my opinion, there are various meanings to the term of showing kindness or being nice. I’ve known a bunch of people that I would put them in the category of being kind.

When a person is kind, they will go out of their way to help you without asking. I try not to mention names. But, I want to use a few friends as examples.

After I got out of the hospital last summer Shirley, Peggy and Evelyn went out of their way to visit me and they offered help, even though they know I try to do things myself. All three of the ladies showed up at my house and they said that they will help me with all types of things. They know that I have a very difficult time when it comes to cooking, cleaning and so on. They don’t take no for an answer.

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My friend Jennifer Harris

As I was waking up,  I remember my friend Jennifer Harris, Rhonda Tommer and her daughter Sam sitting there holding my hand and praying for me. Even though I couldn’t talk or carry on conversations, they would talk to me and pray for me. I couldn’t even open my eyes for more than a couple of minutes. My friend Jennifer brought her mom and I remember Gerta standing at the foot of my bed, Jennifer holding my hands. Jessica and Beckiah were present too. Even though I couldn’t say or do anything, all of my friends and family carried on positive conversations with me.  I remember like it was yesterday

 

My daughter Jessica picks me up each week to cash my husband’s check and she takes me around town to do all the things I can’t. Since my muscles give out and I pass out a few times a day, she is always there. If she can’t take me to do what I need, others will.

I would like to share this though. When people assume that a person is in a coma and they can’t hear what anyone is saying. I want to say that I could hear what people were saying. I could hear the Dr’s and nurses that weren’t in my room. I could smell the perfume that someone was wearing. I don’t know who, but someone was wearing perfume. if you know of anyone who is in a coma, please speak kindly to them. Even if they can’t carry on a conversation, I could still hear them. One day I may write a book about what I could hear and smell.  There is a young lady named Claire Wineland. She died a year ago after she had a lung transplant since she had Cystic Fibrosis. This is a video that’s under 5 minutes. But, her experience is similar to my experiences.  Claires Coma experience.

While I was listening to the message that the pastor at the church was saying that there are some pastors and church leaders that play the niceness card, but they don’t actually care. They will go through the motions of caring because they have the mindset and say, ” it’s my job” and when they are finished going through the motions, they will go home when it’s time to go off the clock. Some church leaders and pastors know the right words and actions, but, they don’t really care.

I’ve gone to a number of churches in my life. My church had a pastor who showed up on time because it was his responsibility. I’ve mentioned this in a couple of blogs a few years ago. There was a huge split in my church because of his actions. He would pray for people and said the right words.

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Dena Allen

One of my dear friends Dena Allen who’s with the Lord now would come home from church and felt defeated.  Dena was was hard of hearing, in her 80’s and knew more about the Bible than anyone I knew. I stopped going to church at that time because I couldn’t stomach what he was doing. I got to know him on a personal level and I feel like that was one of the main reasons I stopped going. It was at that point when I decided to check out Oasis Community Church.

 

Pastor Marc always listened to those at the church. Even if you weren’t a member, he was there and so were the people at church. When he said that we should be witnessing and going outside of the building and reach those who can’t go to church. Reach those who have left and have been hurt for one reason or another. He had Bible studies in his home. If I had a problem and needed to talk, he came to take and to pray with me and for me without asking.

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My daughter Jessica 

When my daughter Jessica called me when I was in the hospital, she asked me if I could get a wedding together in 2 weeks. Most of that year, I was in the hospital At that time, I only went to that church for a couple of months, if that. I called the pastor and he got on the phone to a number of church members. I was blown away by the pastor.

He performed the wedding, we had a friend come and play a portable piano for the wedding march. My friend Dawn did all of the decorations and my friend Ramona made all of the food. I didn’t have to ask for anything and nobody would take money from me. I was and still, am beyond humble because of what they did. Three days after the wedding, I was back in the hospital for another 2 months.

There is also another small church here that did the same thing. All I had to do was mention that I was having a difficult time physically and that pastor came knocking at my door and he was there for me without asking.

oroWhile I was watching the service from the church in Tucson, I was reminded that even though a person may have the job of being a pastor or church leader, it doesn’t mean that the pastor or whoever is truly kind to others. When he said this, it made me sad because I’ve always felt that pastors are given a special gift by shepherding the congregation and are doing what is right. However, some pastors just think of it as a job, not a calling.

The pastor that was at my church almost destroyed it. Our church was affiliated with American Baptist Churchs. We had to get serious held from the ABC church district offices. It took many years for our church to heal. At that time and while I was listening to the sermon a week or so ago, I realized that not all pastors have what’s best for the people in the church their hearts.

While I was praying along with the pastor that I was watching, I was praying and God let me know that even though I love music and I would want to be a singer, but singing isn’t the gift that God gave me. It’s the same thing with pastors and it was with Pastor Wayne. He wanted to be a preacher and he went to seminary I think at Moody Bible College. He graduated, but he wasn’t called to be a pastor just because he wanted to. Instead of leading the sheep in the church, he became the wolf and destroyed lives and most of the people left the church and he didn’t care. He was doing what he wanted to do.

Lately, I haven’t felt like I’m not being Spiritually fed. I listen to a number of churches through streaming. The pastor was talking about how we are told to be Christlike.

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John 6:27 “Do not work for the food which perishes, but for the food which endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give to you, for on Him the Father, God, has set His seal.”

At the end of the sermon, the pastor asked a question about kindness. He instructed those who were listening. He asked everyone if we are kind. Of course, he couldn’t see the responses from everyone watching. Are we being kind to those around us, or do we think and speak negatively to, or about, them? Being kind is no small or easy thing. When we show kindness to those in our lives we yield positive fruits in our lives and to those around us.

I know this blog is a bit scattered. I hope you could keep up with it. I had a lot of things on my mind lately and that’s why I’m doing this post in 2 or 3 parts.

 

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When You’re Waiting

aol_am799m13Our way of living and our world has become face-paced and people want instant gratification. Twenty years ago the internet would take anywhere from five minutes to thirty minutes. There was no WIFI connections. We had AOL as the main internet company that most people used because they would send free CD’s in the mail and they would offer 100 free hours of internet.  The speed was either 56K and it took a while to connect.  We thought we had everything at lightening speed and we could fill our time with learning about anything we want to learn. For those who have never heard what dial up sounds like, you can watch this 30 second video.

What we thought was exciting and educational, the internet ended up being a curse in many ways. Hours were wasting away because of all of the things we could fill our minds with. Everything became fast-paced and we had instant gratification. When we had to wait the extra 10 minutes waiting for a web-page to open, it become frustrating and at times painful. We had countless possibilities and opportunities.  While time was being spent spending hours and sometimes days in front of the computer screen, life was passing us by.

facebook-vs-myspace

I would spend time chatting to people who I didn’t know in a chatroom in Angelhaven. I didn’t know the people on the other side of the computer screen. I spent more time speaking to strangers then I did with my family. Eventually the chatroom’s closed and Myspace took over. Myspace was all over the place. Pictures can be shared and conversations galore. And then more time was being spent away from our real lives. Hours and days passed quickly. Facebook ended up taking over the internet by storm and even more hours and days are spend away from real life.

Then there came a time when my daughters were graduating and they got married, and now I have grandkids. It seems as if the time being spent with loved ones are in front of the computer or smart phones instead of spending time together face to face. I don’t think all of these advances in technology is a good thing. These advances have taken away real relationships in our every day lives.

I’ve found that since I have a number of medical problems prevent me from regularly going to church. So, instead I watch church on youtube or on ROKU. I watch Oro Valley Church of the Nazarene in Tucson, AZ or Sutherland Springs First Baptist Church in Sutherland Springs, Texas. While I always feel blessed from their services, it isn’t good to not worship with other Christians in our day to day lives.

One of the sermons I was listening to at Oro Valleys youtube channel was about how we should be patient while were waiting for God to direct our paths. There have been a number of things that I have been praying to God for answers. I do feel like He has given me those answers.

While I was praying and searching the internet for Bible verses, I realized that even though our experiences may be different, we all face crossroads and we face seasons of waiting at some point in our lives. For about a year and a half, I’ve been on the high speed internet connection. our WIFI connections are now 500 Mbps and takes literally a couple of seconds to connect to the internet. But, this is one of those times it’s best that our lives should be on the 56K dial up connection. Instead of wanting everything in seconds, we should be taking it slow.

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 If you’re struggling now, and you haven’t heard from God yet ( or maybe you haven’t accepted His answer), I’ve found a few Bible verses that have helped me find comfort and hope. God has a plan for all of us and when I’ve been feeling stuck, I hold onto these words and they bring me hope that brighter days are just ahead.

 

  • Isaiah 40:31“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
  • Lamentations 3:25“The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.”
  • Psalm 27:14“Wait for the LORD; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the LORD.”

 

Jasper’s – A Piece of My Heart

I wanted to do this blog post soon than later.

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Jasper- A huge part of my heart

I’ve been in tears for over a while now because I know it’s  close to the time where I need to let him  go to the Rainbow Bridge. But, I’m heart broken over it and I he needs me to be there, even though a part of my soul is going with him. My dog Jasper is my shadow.

I rescued him from these people that was getting rid of him because he sheds too much. my daughter Jessica found him for me.  If I didn’t take him, they were going to lie to the animal shelter and tell them that he bit their kids. Jasper doesn’t bite at all unless it’s food. Jasper did knock the kids down while playing. The kids would run around their house and Jasper would run after the kids to play.

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This is not from our animal shelter. 

This picture is what happens to animals in shelters who are destroyed because they would be considered unadoptable or no body would adopt them . Had it not been for me learning the truth about Jasper would have been killed just like these dogs.  since the people said that Jasper bit her children, he would never have been adopted because of the lie and he would have been murdered the moment he arrived. Animals who are considered dangerous or unhealthy have no chance of being adopted. The only chance Jasper would have had is if the shelter seen for themselves that they were lying. But, if an owner brings their pets in and says they bit or was aggressive, they have to do what the owner said.  Our shelters are no kill now, but it wasn’t until 3 or 4 years ago.   

People like that makes me sick. But, I am thankful at the same time. if  it wasn’t for them, I would never have gotten to know him and to have him in my life. Since I know that he is going to be going over the Rainbow Bridge soon, I’m trying to build lasting memories of Jasper.  I’m taking lots of pictures and doing videos of him. I always watch his food intake and now I’m letting him eat what he wants and as often as he wants. I’m not going to tell him to not eat what he wants. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this. I have many medical issues and my blood pressure goes up to 230/120 when I’m stressed or running around. I don’t even know how I’m going to be.

The three pictures above is when I first go Jasper. The middle one is Jasper eating a cookie that I was eating. I was training him or I thought I was. Instead, he was training me, lol.

I hope people don’t get upset when I constantly talk about Jasper. Our pets are not just pets, they are family.  I’ve also had people tell me that he will be in a better place. I just hope they don’t say that when he goes to sleep. The better place is with me, not anywhere else.

29313514_10211315397777526_5192522942973476864_nI do feel that when animals die that there is a special place for them. God created all things. I get very frustrated and upset when people say they just die. If animals can tell when we are sad or need help, they are there. Their love is unconditional, not like humans. Animals have emotions, they cry and smile. They demonstrate love and compassion. There are times when I’m having a bad day and I get upset with them because they either pee’d on something, got in a fight or whatever, and yet they are forgiving and non judgmental.

When I get upset over Jasper barking all the time, I feel so much guilt. I tell him or whichever dog we have that I’m sorry and I shouldn’t have gotten mad and I shouldn’t have yelled at them. I know that I will carry a great deal of guilt when he’s gone. I know he doesn’t understand and probably can’t hear me when I love on him and full blown tears that’s I’m so very sorry that I got upset.

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This is from the first night that I brought Jasper  home on October 13th, 2011. I think Jasper didn’t figure out he is suppose to sleep in the bed, not next to it lol 

When I first got Jasper( October 13, 2011 ) his name use to be Buddah. As a Christian, Budda was not an option. My daughter Jessica actually chose Jasper’s name. When I brought Jasper home, he immediately became my shadow. I actually thought Jasper would attach himself to Jessica since she held Jasper all the way home.  Within an hour or two, Jasper knew I was his mommy. He follows me to the bathroom, outside, all over the house and so on. I use to let him sleep on our bed, but I stopped a while back since he started having problems getting on and off the bed. We bought stairs f or the bed, but he still had problems. We took the stairs down and stopped letting any of the dogs on our bed.

The reason I did that was because jasper would cry when he would see the others on the bed and he couldn’t. So, we just stopped letting any of them on there. if one can’t, then no can.

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Maverick and Mattie

Jasper loves watching TV and himself. I did a video of our dogs Mattie and Maverick. Mattie I rescued from Arizona Almost Home Boxer Rescue in Arizona. Click here to see the video of him watching Mattie and Maverick.  I have many videos of Jasper watching TV or videos. I will be sharing some of those below.  I remember when I bought his first snoopy dog bed and all of the things. I knew I was going to have to do a memorial for Jasper, but I don’t want to do it right away after he goes to the Rainbow Bridge, I wanted to do this while he is alive.

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Eric Dodge and his dog Anna. Anna went over Rainbow Ridge over a year ago.  Eric Dodge is a country music singer, author and speaker.  This is his WebsiteListen to his music (Youtube)

I was talking to a friend who lost his dog Anna and his cat Bart recently. I have horrible memories of when I had Brandie, Maverick and Mattie put to sleep. I can’t watch any videos of animals being put to sleep. That’s because all I think about is when I had to put Brandie, Maverick and Mattie down. I have major anxiety over it and I have major meltdowns. I asked Eric if he was with Anna and Bart when they were put down. he said that he wasn’t. he couldn’t emotionally be there. Eric is one of those guys that I have a ton of respect for and that’s because of his love of animals, family and friends. Eric wears his heart on his sleeves and I appreciate that. So many people don’t care and it’s nice to see the love for his pets and others.

Eric Dodge is a Country Music Star, Author and Speaker (Check out his sites). While you can listen to Erics music on many outlets, he doesn’t make anything when people listen for free. So, let’s send a little bit of love his way and purchase his music.

When he said he wasn’t there when Anna and Bart were put to sleep, I 100 percent get it. I have been thinking about how was I going to handle watching jasper put to sleep because of how I had so many problems when I had to be there for Brandie, Maverick and Mattie. To this day, I still have nightmares of that.

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Grandma Grace

I think for myself I have a lot of emotions with seeing them dye in front of my eyes and in my arms reminds me of my Grandma Grace. This may sound crazy, but when my grandma died and all of us kids went to her funeral, my mom made us go up to my grandma and kiss her on the cheeks. I was only 10 yrs old.  My grandma gave me a dog as an early Christmas gift. His name was Spartacus. I only had him for a week when my grandma died on December 5th, 1973. After grandma died abut a month or so later, some boys took my dog and threw him in the river in the middle of winter. We lived in Indiana and Sparticus died in front of my eyes and in my arms. The boys dad thought it was funny and my mom said, ‘OH WELL”.  Sparticus was the only thing I had that my grandma gave me. Spaticus was a little Pekingese.

goodbyedogsThe picture above isn’t my dog or cat. I couldn’t put pictures of my dogs that we had to put to sleep. I have a hard time seeing our 4 legged family members dead. 

Anytime I’m with one of our pets (family members) when they die, my heart and mind goes back to that time. As I have been probably over thinking this, a show that I was watching always comes to mind and this is it. But, then I think about how a vet show that I was watching was talking about how. Most of the quote below I don’t agree with. I think there are pro’s and cons when it comes to having to put your loved one to sleep.  I think it’s them guilt tripping.  So, use your own judgement and don’t let anyone guilt you.

“I beg of you DO NOT LEAVE THEM,” “Do not make them transition from life to death that has those who they don’t know.  He also said that our pets will be searching for you if you just drop them off and then they die with nobody knowing them. They will think you are ABANDONING THEM.

This statement below is something I think the vet is wrong. There are times when people can’t be with their beloved pet. There are many reasons why. those reasons are maybe they can’t physically be there. For example an older person, medially unwell, out of town and a whole host of other reasons.

My God, can you imagine? I’m sorry, but if the thought of your beloved pet’s little face scanning a room full of scary, unfamiliar people, trying to find you, the human it loves, in the literal last moments before its death doesn’t move you to tears, you have no business owning an animal in the first place.

When I heard that, I had a tremendous amount of guilt. I love Jasper so much and all I can imagine is him being afraid and abandoned. I’ve gone through it many times and for some reason, this time it’s different. I loved my other dogs so much and I was there for them. I was also there for pets that we rescued that had to be put down because of how they would bite people and children. They were hostile and very aggressive. Even though we rescued them a week later, we couldn’t safely adopt them out. Or we had to put down sick dogs that had parvo or other medical conditions that they wouldn’t survive, so there is no need to make them suffer.

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This is me holding Jasper. This was taken  around April or may of 2012

Out of all of the websites that I have been to that discusses euthanize I liked this one best and it discusses both sides.  Click Here: Vet Street

In closing, this is one of the comments that the vet shared on the video and the reason I will be there with Jasper. Even though I may have to go to my Dr so I can get a prescription for anxiety. I know I will have it big time.

From Vet Show- Don’t deny your animals the chance to feel as safe and loved in their last moments as they have their entire lives. They give us all their love. They deserve this.

 

Parker’s Story – Rescued From a Hoarder

This is going to be a series  of blogs about our dogs and why we rescued them from deplorable and abusive homes and hoards. I’m doing this series because I know there are some big changes coming in the next week or two. The pictures below is of Parker when we first rescued him and recently.

Parker’s Story- A Handful Of Cuteness

I’m sure many who knows me personally and on my Facebook pages knows about my dogs and how we rescue them from bad situations such as hoarding groups, high kill shelters and so on.  We’ve rescued boxers, pugs, cats, mixed breeds, birds, horses, goats, rabbits, lizards and other animals that didn’t ask to be put in dangers way.

Usually when we rescue an animal, we always look for a good home for them and homes are screened and the people interested are also. When rescue them, find good homes and that makes it so we can rescue another animal that’s being abused.  But, about 5 years ago, we decided to not re-home our pugs and our mixed pug/pekingese. And that is for the most part because Jasper, Parker and Henry became more than rescues, they became family. We always feel that all animals are more than animals, they are family. Well, not snakes and spiders.

parkerscaredWe rescued Parker in October of 2013. That’s by the boarder of Mexico and 2 1/2 hours from Tucson.  My parents lived in a tiny little farm town called Elfrida, AZ. My mom and sister Brenda adopted a few puppies from this group. I asked my mom if she would get me information on the hoarding group. She did and these people at I would say well over 50 dogs and I have no clue on how many cats. These people had Pekingese’s, Pugs, Chihuahua’s and not sure what else. The county told the people that they had to get rid of all but 10 of the dogs and all males had to be fixed. I called the lady and told her that I’m going to go visit my parents and if they needed homes, then I may bring a couple back to Utah and re-home them. I had no intention of keeping them.

douglasDouglas, Az is about 12-14 hours from where I live. But, I went anyhow. I met the lady and I was shocked at the conditions. All of these dogs lived in horrible condition’s and it made me sick.  After seeing the condition’s, I realized I couldn’t take more than one back. That’s because the medical needs for all of those dogs could be dangerous for my dogs. So, I did find Parker. He had one eye that he was blind in and he was in decent shape. With my husband and I living in a condo, we couldn’t take that many animals. St. George only allows 2 dogs and I had to get a special permit for Parker.

Since I volunteered for a rescue group in Arizona I was able to use the 501C3 status as a non-profit.  But, we brought Parker back with us. He was terrified of everything. He had extreme separation anxiety. In 3 days, he ate doggie doors, door frames, escaped out of enclosed and locked crates.  We took him to our vet and they told us that Parker was castrated like cows are castrated. The vet told me that they only seen that in one place and that was in Douglas, AZ.  When I told him that’s where we got him, he wasn’t surprised. While we were at the vets office we also made sure that he had all shots. The lady said she gave them shots, but there is no way I would believe that.  When the vet said he was castrated, it broke my heart. I couldn’t let Parker really hang out much with Jasper and Patsy. I’ll go into her story also in this series. I just want to give each of the dogs, their own story.

Anyhow, since we intended to find a good home for Parker, that was almost impossible because of his anxiety. He was highly destructive and afraid of anything and anyone. For the drive back home from Arizona, he was in my arms and had his face hidden in the crook of my arm. he wouldn’t eat, drink or anything for the 14 hour drive. He was terrified. Once we got into St. George we only had 5 minutes till we got home. But, as soon as we got off of the freeway, Parker lifted his head up. He must have known we slowed down and stopped at the light.

189625_3950251631548_566846998_nI told my husband that once we get home, we need to make sure to put Parker in the dog crate that we brought with us in case he tried to dart. We only used the crate while we were in the hotel in Tombstone and we learned really fast that Parker runs and hides. He ran under the bed and positioned himself so we couldn’t get him. Once we finally caught him, we made sure to put him in there and then drove the 3 hours to Phoenix and we got him a harness. While he was in the crate, he was literally trying to escape and he was flinging his crate with him in it all over the back of the car.  Since he was doing that, we had to get a harness where we can hold onto him and it hand a handle.

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Parker is scared because a friend came over and she always speaks loud and he thought he was in trouble. Even though we were talking about updating her computer lol.

It took us a year to get to the point where he wasn’t afraid of us. He still trembles if we raise our voices and he hides.  Every time we thought he was ready for a new home, he was so afraid to even interact with anyone unless it was our family. My sister Joyce wanted him and we did let her have him. Joyce absolutely loves Parker. The only problem was her husband is a truck driver and Joyce and Ira took him on the truck with them for a few weeks. When they came home from being on the road, Parker was skin and bones. That was because he was very nervous and he is terrified of noises.  Semi trucks are very loud when it comes to airlines, horns and all of the road noises. From my understanding he was doing what he did when we first rescued him.

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Parker Now

Even though my sister loves him, it wasn’t good for Parker. He was starving because of his anxiety. He didn’t want to even go potty when the truck was stopped. Now, my sister has visitation rights lol. Even though Parker loves Joyce, we realized that we could never re-home Parker. We’ve had Parker for 6 years now and he isn’t going anywhere. Parker is our problem child. The lady that we got him from said Parker was 8 months and he looked like he was still in his puppy phase.

I want to close this by saying that if anyone is looking for a pet, please try to rescue one. Animal shelters normally have all types of animals. I know many people wants puppies, but if you can save an animal, please give it a try. I’ve found that instead of me rescuing them, they rescue me.  There are many who will tell people to adopt instead of shop. There are benefits to both and even the animals in pet stores need to be rescued. I’ve bought before and usually it’s because I know the people who are breeding. But, I will always choose to adopting since shelters will kills animals if they aren’t adopted really fast. Usually they give them 5 days.

In the next day or two, I will share another rescue.