Tag: friendships

Serious Moonlight- My Thoughts

Published on by Sandie DLeave a comment

ImageSitting here watching this cheesy movie with Med Ryan and Timothy Hutton got me thinking. I know this is a dangerous thing to do, but come along with me on this little journey.

The movie is called Serious Moonlight. This is the story-line for Serious Moonlight;

Louise (Meg Ryan) wants to find a way to reconnect with her husband, Ian (Timothy Hutton), who is divorcing her after many years of marriage. But when she surprises him at their country home, she is more than slightly dismayed that the roses and romantic set-up are not for her but for his much younger mistress. Louise takes matters into her own hands, and abducts Ian duct-taping him to the toilet, where he must admit to his true feelings and he is unable to leave her. Things grow exceedingly awry for everybody when a burglar shows up at their house, and then everybody must discover and admit to their true feelings.

So this is where my thinking begins. In the movie Ian is telling Louise that he fell out of love with her because she didn’t need him and he needed to be with someone who needs him, not just wanting to be with him. This kinda reminds me of my last blog about dogs and we love them because they need us. But anyhow, let me not get distracted in my thoughts here and revert to puppy love, lol.

The reason I got to thinking about this is how people in our lives are like that. Sometimes when the need is gone they leave. I know for myself , there are times it was time to exit door left. They are only there for the crisis’s or lows and then when things start to go well, they are no longer there. Would that be considered a true friendship or someone that God put there for a purpose and then poof they are gone.

For me when I think about true friendships or relationships, it is for the long haul. I don’t know if a real relationship exists on only highs or lows. I have had some friends that were great when it came to if I needed something, but not in the lolls of life. I think they are more like blips of time. There is a season for everything and that is true of relationships and friendships. I thank God for those who are here for the long haul and those here for only a season.  Of course, I would be without flaws, right? OK! I needed to put a funny in there for those who really know me and how I do stupid things all the time or forget whatever it may be or who they are.

ImageWith Louse she was bent on trying to push her husband back into loving her no matter what it takes. Even strapping him to the toilet and making chocolate chip cookies. I guess in some off the wall way of reasoning I can see why she would stoop to any level to keep the man she loves and not allow another lady to steal her man. Kudos to her. Too bad people don’t put this much effort into relationships of whatever degree. This starts another thought, sorry. But how many times do people try to push others to be a part of their lives or to be accepted. Why is it that people need to be accepted by someone who has no desire or need to be with them?

This was a pretty cheesy movie overall and not one of Meg Ryan’s best movies. There was one funny part though. They are both taped up in the bathroom and Ian tells Louise that he wants to work on his marriage and he thinks he still loves her. She asked him if that’s because your taped to a toilet. That was funny, lol. But it got me thinking and like I wrote earlier, sorry about having to sit with me thinking out this stupid movie. Good thing it wasn’t Sponge Bob. That is a whole other topic, haha.

Puppy Love and Walls

Published on by Sandie DLeave a comment

ImageFacebook can be one of those things that can be good or bad. And status messages are the same. Today a friend of mine posted a interesting status and got me thinking about how true that was.

Mindy’s Status read like this, “It’s interesting to me how a puppy or new pet can come into your life and you love them immediately but when a person comes into your life they have to earn that love. I think it just shows how people really can be we they let down their walls and have an open heart. Love can come in so easy. Anyway just my thought today. Hello friends hope you all have a fantastic day.”

I found her statement very true. I know with my dogs all they have to do is come up and give me a wet slobbery kiss and all is forgiven. They give me those puppy dog eyes and see nothing wrong with what they did. And all is good in the world.

ImageAnd then on the flip side, it is very hard to let people get that close and to love them immediately. We are suppose to love them as we would ourselves, but I have these walls that won’t break down. And once I have been hurt by someone it takes a long long time to regain that trust. Not only regain that trust but to trust others that may be new in my life. But not with my dogs. I will give them chance after chance and I can open up myself and be myself around them. They just lay on my lap or give me lovins and all is well in my world. Why can’t people be that way?

Man, when someone puts out a random thought that gets me thinking is dangerous for all my readers. I was thinking to myself what is so great about dogs and why do people love them so. Here are a few of my thoughts on this subject.

On the topic of building walls I think sometimes they are healthy, but others not quite so. For every hurt a new block is placed and by the time we realize it, we have a full blown wall that nobody can break. There have been people I have put a lot of trust in and because of broken trusts and hurts, one more is added.

If the walls grow too much and you feel like you are loosing contact with the person (happens from time to time – i. e. when a friend is too busy and your friend is just slipping away). There are times if a relationship or friendship means enough to each other the walls can slowly come down. For me that takes time. The reason for that is because I have had my wall open up to certain friends and then I come to find out that the friendship wasn’t really as important to them as it was to be and that trust was broken or the load was to heavy for the friendship. Eventually that wall goes back up and I have a way of just letting the wall stay and letting the mortar set is and not go into anything with anyone.This is a statement someone else said on a website about this topic and I found it all to true for me: Most of us would agree that we show different facets of our personalities in different situations. You open yourself up to different people in different degrees. As you get to know them, like them, and/or trust them, you may decide to open up to a greater degree. Sometimes traumatic or stressful situations throw people together, causing strangers to form close bonds. This is another example of using walls effectively– knowing when to lower them.

When someone I know hurts me, or disappoints me, I find that my guard goes up–the wall gets a little higher. I will be a bit more cautious around them–not as open. But I also find that the more I see qualities that I like in a person, the lower the walls get, and the more I tend to share and trust. I find it is usually reciprocal.

ImageNow let me go into the why I love dogs and why it’s safe to let the walls come tumbling down.

Dogs need us, they give us a purpose. A lot of us have the strong desire and/or need to care for other living beings, and not all have children around. So, we get pets…and those pets like my dogs fill that void.

Dogs remind us to take life easy and to play . Well, they often demand it and we remember that it is fun and important to be silly and laugh. You don’t even need fancy toys. Just relax and follow your dog’s lead.

Dogs understand what is really important. A dog can provide so much of that from being something soft to pet to being a warm body snuggled up against you. My dogs Jasper and Parker love to be loved and they return that ten fold.

Dogs are great listener. They aren’t so good at giving feedback, but that’s okay. The point is to be able to talk and not get an opinion back.

The love of a dog is unconditional. Dogs don’t care what political affiliations or religious beliefs you have. They don’t care if you take a shower or not. You can gain 90 pounds and they’ll still love you. We are constantly judged by others, and even ourselves, but not by our faithful canine companions. Now, they may get a little irritable if you don’t feed them one day, but that’s an easy one to resolve.

After listing all the things that are great about dogs, I think us humans need to take lead and pay attention to them.