Yep! I guess I will join with the many others that are on the Paula Deen bandwagon. If ya all haven’t heard this she has said something in her past that is coming back to haunt her. She said the “N” word and some other things. Now, I really like Paula Deen and I really feel for her right now. She has apologized and was asked point-blank if she has ever used the “N” Word…
My personal feelings are that nobody should use the “N” word, the “F” word or so on. I think it is terrible and just shows the mentality of the person using it. I guess this is kinda personal for me because growing up we used the “N” word when we would go to the store to ask for Brazil Nuts. I never realized till many years later that they weren’t called “N” toes. Also growing up it was very common to hear others around me call fixing things with baling wire and string a way of “N” rigging. As I got older, I realized that it was wrong and hurtful to those around me and I made sure to correct myself.
Then there is the”F” word. The reason I bring this up is that in my past, I never seen anything wrong with using the “F” word or whatever else that would be considered cursing. My husband was in the Army and I worked at a truck stop and it was common to talk like a sailor and never thought anything of it. That was until I was in a restaurant and nobody else was talking like I was and God decided I needed to hear how bad it sounded. I made a decision at that point to not swear because it wasn’t the right thing to do.
I bring these things up because these are things from my past. And thankfully my past is my past. These things aren’t a part of my life now and haven’t been for almost 19 years. If I were to be judged on these times that I used this language, then I would be on the cross with Jesus Christ. I knew I was guilty and was in the wrong at some point. Now I did make sure to correct my way of talking and haven’t gone back to using this language. I find that I get pretty angry when people only know how to use the “F” bomb or other colorful language. Maybe that is because I know how wrong it is and how bad it sounds. At least for me it does.
Now, back to Paula Deen. She has asked for forgiveness and knew what she said was wrong. Should we condemn her or should we forgive her. I have chosen to forgive her. I have no room to judge her because I have made my own set of mistakes. The time Paula Deen was asked about using the “N” word was from the 1980’s. That was a long time ago and her shows came on much later than that. People do change and grow from the lessons they have learned. I know I have and Paula is a human who says things that shouldn’t be said and admitted to them.
One thing I never understood though is why is it OK for blacks to use the “N” word and not whites. I don’t mean this in a disrespectful way, but it does make me wonder why there is a difference. I do feel many times the race card comes out when it isn’t about race. Sometimes it is upbringing, peers, not knowing the difference or so on. I know there have been times I have said things and didn’t understand what I was saying. Of course I was much younger and have gotten better at knowing what to say and not say. I do still have my stupid moments though, lol
Then I wonder how many of us would have a job or friends if we were judged on every single thing we said in the past.
I guess I will end this post with this thought and hopefully half the world doesn’t try to condemn me like they have Paula. My final thought is that it is better to forgive then to hate. You can get further with forgiveness than being hateful. I think awareness is very important, but is there really a need to have a lynch mob go after Paula Deen? I say NO!
I guess I must be too thick skinned when it comes to “labels.” I grew up in an era of PIC. (Politically Incorrect). I was an Okie, living in the Prunepicker state where the Wet Backs knew they had no right to be. Don’t confuse them with Mexican citizens! Oh, yeah, I got in a couple of scuffles in grade school when a girl called me an Okie. I also had friends that called me-Hey, Okie- the difference is: My friends were using the term affectionately. The one who called me Okie & brought on physical contact used it as an insult. The same was true for my high school friends. There were the Okies, Arkies, Portugees, Waps, Dago, Spicks, Budah Heads, –you get the picture. If you called someone one of those names in a certain tone, you’d better run!! On the other hand, if I said to my friend Louie: “Hey, I hear there’s a big Portugee shindig this weekend” Louie did not take offense. We could tell jokes about each others national origins. Most of the time it was the Arkie telling a joke about Arkies, Okie about Okies, and so on. This country has forgotten how to laugh at itself. I always hated the “N” word though. For some reason, even then, it was a bad word. The other nicknames were OK, that one wasn’t OK.. Strange……
I take offense when I hear someone use an ethnic slur. Slurs are slurs, and show ignorance and intolerance.
I probably, no, I absolutely should have kept my mouth shut on this subject, because I don’t think it’s coming across too well, so I will now stop!!
Shirley
PS. This Okie married a Dago Prunepicker that was raised in the Webfoot state and lived mostly happily ever after for 59 years.
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LOL… I know what you are talking about. We grew up with all kinds of labels and maybe we didn’t think as much about them because their wasn’t the media technology that there is now. I do think there is a big difference on how it is perceived or taken depending on how it is used. Once I found out how bad the “N” word was and how it was perceived, I got the message loud and clear not to use it. I think when it comes to Paula Deen, I look at the generation she lived in and where she lives. From my understanding of history, it was very much an area where blacks weren’t respected and slavery was alive. I don’t think anyone should call someone something like that. But then at the same time I think that people can grow and learn from their past mistakes. And I know that many of my mouth blunders were mistakes and from not knowing or understanding. We hear things as children and think nothing of it until we are taught. I know when you brought up wetbacks, we would call people that came here illegally from Mexico or scratch backs because they would come in under the fence. Maybe we need a book of what is acceptable and not acceptable and who can say it and who can’t.
Like I said in one of my comments, I wonder why it is OK for some to use it and not others. I would think it would be wrong for anyone and there are a lot of mixed messages. When I hear some of the songs on the radio and a rapper is using the “N” word and it is accepted. I don’t understand why that would be though. Am I making sense on this or is it just me?